Are You Investing in Your Business Partnership Like You Would in a Romantic Relationship?

In any romantic relationship, we put in time, energy, and effort to nurture and communicate effectively. We do this to maintain a healthy, strong connection. But do we invest the same level of care in our business partnerships? After all, these partnerships can have a profound impact on our lives and livelihoods. If we treat our business relationships like we do our marriages, could they be more successful and resilient?

Imagine meeting a talented colleague. Together, you form a business vision that could change the world, touching thousands, if not millions. In the beginning, the energy is high, and the excitement is contagious. But soon, you start hearing jokes about having a "work wife" or "work husband." While these comments may seem light-hearted, they may raise a deeper question. Are you nurturing this business relationship with the same commitment and care you would give a romantic one?

The truth is, many professionals and entrepreneurs don't give their business partnerships the same attention as their personal relationships. This can be problematic. Like romantic partnerships, business collaborations can encounter conflict, communication breakdowns, and emotional stress. If these issues aren't addressed, resentment can grow, and it may eventually lead to the collapse of the partnership. Just as in a marriage, open communication and conflict resolution are key to preserving trust and harmony. Let’s break down why investing in your business relationship matters and how to strengthen it.

Why You Should Invest in Your Business Relationship

In romantic relationships, we often work through differences, communicate openly, and understand each other’s emotional needs. Why should it be any different in business?

Business partnerships involve shared dreams, visions, and the hard work of building something from the ground up. The stress and emotional investment required to make this work can be as intense as any romantic relationship. When disagreements or pressure arise, these situations can escalate if not properly managed. When communication falters, issues can fester, causing frustration, anger, or burnout. Without the proper tools for conflict resolution, you may eventually find yourself wondering if it’s time to walk away. But is it the business itself, or the lack of healthy communication, that’s causing the stress?

The Danger of Toxic Communication: The Four Horsemen

In any relationship, effective communication is essential. But under stress, communication can break down. Dr. John Gottman is a renowned expert in relationship science. He's well-known for identifying four destructive communication patterns. Known as The Four Horsemen, these patterns can predict the downfall of a relationship. They can be just as harmful to a business partnership as they are in romantic ones.

1. Criticism

Criticism goes beyond simple feedback. It involves attacking your partner’s character or personality. Conversely, it's better to address specific behaviors. In a business setting, you may say, “I’m frustrated when deadlines are missed because it impacts the team." A criticism would be, “You’re always late, and it’s your fault things are behind.”

2. Contempt

Contempt is one of the most damaging behaviors. It’s often marked by sarcasm, mocking, or belittling. In business, this could look like undermining your partner’s ideas or dismissing their contributions. It may also involve showing disrespect for their skills and expertise.

3. Defensiveness

When we feel attacked, our natural response may be to become defensive. Unfortunately, this can quickly escalate the situation. Instead of listening, we may focus on justifying our actions, which can cause the conversation to go in circles.

4. Stonewalling

Stonewalling occurs when one partner shuts down completely during a difficult conversation. This can occur either emotionally or physically. In a business context, this could mean avoiding tough discussions or ignoring emails. They may also withdraw from critical issues.

Strategies for Effective Healthy Communication

To help avoid and address these toxic forms of communication, consider the goals of effective communication. At ELVT Mental Health, we recommend doing this before approaching difficult conflicts. Some of these goals, as identified by Brené Brown, include:

• I’m ready to sit next to you rather than across from you.
  This means positioning yourself as an ally rather than an adversary. Approach the conversation with the mindset of collaboration.

• I’m willing to put the problem in front of us rather than between us (or sliding it toward you).
  Keep the focus on solving the problem together, not blaming each other.

• I’m ready to listen, ask questions, and accept that I may not fully understand the issue.
  Approach the situation with curiosity and an open mind. Seek to understand your partner’s perspective rather than rushing to conclusions.

• I’m ready to acknowledge what you do well instead of picking apart your mistakes.
  Celebrate each other’s strengths and contributions. Focusing on the positive fosters a more productive and supportive environment.

• I recognize your strengths and how you can use them to address your challenges.
  Instead of focusing on weaknesses, highlight your partner’s abilities to help navigate challenges.

• I can hold you accountable without shaming or blaming.
  Accountability doesn’t have to involve criticism or shame. Address issues respectfully, with the goal of improving the situation.

• I am open to owning my part.
  Acknowledge your own role in any issues or conflicts. Taking responsibility builds trust and promotes mutual respect.

• I can genuinely thank someone for their efforts rather than criticize them for their failings.
  Express appreciation for the hard work your partner puts in, even if things don’t go perfectly. This builds goodwill and positive reinforcement.

• I can talk about how resolving these challenges will lead to growth and opportunity.
  Frame challenges as opportunities for growth, both personally and professionally.

• I can model the vulnerability and openness that I expect to see from you.
  By being vulnerable and open, you invite your partner to do the same. This fosters a culture of trust and cooperation.

• I am aware of power dynamics, implicit bias, and stereotypes.
  Be conscious of power dynamics and how they may influence your communication. Strive for equality and fairness in your partnership.

Building A Healthier Relationship With Your Business Partner(s)

So how can you avoid these harmful communication patterns? How can you create a healthier dynamic with your business partner? Here are a few tips often recommended during therapy for high-performing business professionals:

1. Prioritize Communication
   Make time for regular, open conversations about your partnership. Address potential issues before they escalate. Approach these conversations with respect. Listen to understand, and be willing to express your thoughts and feelings without judgment.

2. Recognize Dangerous Toxic Communication Patterns
   Be mindful of toxic communication patterns in your partnership. If you find yourself slipping into criticism, contempt, defensiveness, or stonewalling, pause and reset the conversation. Acknowledge these behaviors and commit to breaking the cycle.

3. Seek Expert Support
   If communication continues to be a challenge, consider bringing in a business coach or therapist to guide your partnership. Professionals in business partnerships, attachment theory, and communication can help identify and address deeper issues. This support can provide valuable tools for healthy conflict resolution.

4. Emotional Regulation
   Develop strategies for managing stress and regulating your emotions. Whether through mindfulness, therapy, or stress-management techniques, controlling your emotional responses will allow you to communicate more effectively under pressure.

5. Celebrate Milestones Together
   Building a business is difficult, and it’s easy to get caught up in the challenges. Celebrate your wins—big and small. Acknowledge each other’s contributions. Additionally, remind yourselves of the shared vision that brought you together. This helps maintain a positive, collaborative atmosphere.

Don’t Let Your Business Dream Slip Away

The stresses of entrepreneurship can strain even the strongest partnerships. But the loss of a business that you’ve poured your heart and soul into can be far more significant than the conflict you’re facing. It’s crucial to prioritize your partnership and invest in its health, just like you would in a romantic relationship.

With the right tools and mindset, our experienced entrepreneur therapists can help you overcome the destructive patterns that threaten your business. Treat your partnership with the care, respect, and communication it deserves. In doing so, you’ll likely see your business thrive in ways you never imagined.

Take Action: Reach Out to Professional and Entrepreneur Therapists in Bozeman, MT, for Expert Support

Struggling to navigate the challenges in your business partnership? Don’t hesitate to reach out for professional guidance. Working with experts in business partnerships, attachment styles, and communication can help you build a stronger, more resilient foundation. Don’t let communication breakdowns or unresolved issues threaten your business success. Invest in your partnership today and watch your business grow.

Contact our boutique therapy practice in Bozeman, MT, for intensive support. We'll help you and your partner develop healthier communication and resolve conflicts effectively. We'll also show you how to create a lasting, successful partnership. Here’s how to start:

• Schedule a consultation with us at ELVT Mental Health

• Meet with one of our professional and entrepreneur therapists

• Learn how to nurture your business partnerships for long-term success

Other Services Offered by ELVT Mental Health in Montana

As therapists for high-achievers, professionals, and entrepreneurs, we offer a variety of services to cater to help clients at any stage of their career and life. At our Bozeman, MT therapy practice, some of our specialties include therapy for professionals, trauma therapy, relationship therapy, grief therapy, and counseling for depression and anxiety. Additionally, we specialize in mental health coaching and can help you determine if this approach would benefit you more than counseling.

Let our team of qualified therapists help you elevate your wellness and empower your life. For more resources, read through our regularly updated blog and listen to our new podcast. When you’re ready to move forward, schedule an appointment with us to start your journey toward improved mental health.